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Personal Freedom Who’s Perception Is It?

This week there are two hot topics that have come into the media.  I considered blogging about one of them the other day and decided not to.  My blog is not about pushing my views, but exploring my fears and sharing random tid bits from my life.  But after some more thought (the topics just won’t leave my mind) I have decided they do fall under fears of mine, the fear of personal freedom and equality among diversity.  So again, let me state, I am not here to say this side or that side is right or wrong but to look at the fears they create in my life.

So what are the two “Hot Topics”…? Gay marriage and Time magazines new article “Are You Mom Enough” on attachment parenting.

These two topics have divided people in ways that make me sad, to say the least.  It seems to me from both sides of the fight there is an “I’m right, you’re wrong,” mentality.  I hear words like freedom and rights being tossed around like a child’s rag doll.  Folks rushing out to create their picket signs… picket signs with hateful messages in my opinion.  Soon to follow are the news stories of hate crimes and the flames are fueled by another round of hate, from both sides.

Here in America I think we have confused freedom with personal perceptions, this is what I believe or what my religion teaches so this must be what the constitution protects.  The founding fathers must have certainly believed the very same thing I do… right?

Wrong… The words to the constitution may not be so clear, because my perception of the constitution and your perception of it will not be exactly the same.  We all perceive things differently; we interrupt information by relating it to our own life.  It is the things in our lives that help us form what we believe and to us this is what is true and right, this is why so many of us tote our soapbox around and try to get people to see it our way.  And like little children on baseball field picking teams we choose those who see things close to how we do and that group becomes nothing more than a bully, picking on the weaker side.

What scares me most is whose perceptions will pass the next law, or says what a certain freedom is or should be.  Instead of us trying to change someone else’s beliefs shouldn’t we just accept that we are all different?  These two topics show us that we clearly are not ready to live in peace and acceptance.

On gay marriage for instance, I hear a lot of “it’s a religious institution,” but whose religion?  The history of marriage pre-dates written record and it’s certainly older then some religions.  In fact there are historical records showing same sex marriages all around the world in Ancient Greece and Rome, some regions of China, and at certain times in ancient European history.  So if people want to use religion for the reason why same sex unions should not happen then they should also uphold the union of heterosexual couples.  Meaning that divorce should not be tolerated if marriage is to be kept on the religious pedestal, it clearly goes against what certain religions believe.  But then again, there are religions and cultures that say a marriage or a union can be mutually terminated… so who’s right?

Now on to “Are You Mom Enough?”  Seriously?   As if moms don’t have enough on their plate already, let’s heap on a great big scoop of sensationalized crap.  I breast fed all 3 of my children for the first year of each of their lives.  We allowed co-sleeping till about 1 years of age too… This worked for our family.  My sister on the other hand bottle fed and made sure baby was snug in the crib, this was right for her family.  We did not judge one another for her choice, instead we respected our decisions.

Now we have some magazine drawing lines in the sand on how to be mom enough.  And are we to believe the perspective of the author of the article, the moms that they based it on, or our Great Granny Know It All?  Motherhood doesn’t come with a hand book, I don’t care how much Barnes and Nobles wants you to believe otherwise, we learn as we go.  We can seek advice, but every mom will tell you no two children are alike and a mom always knows what’s best for her and her family.

I am left sitting here asking why people can’t let other people live their lives in a way that is best for each individual, or each family.   Why do people fear something that they do not believe in and why do they make it their goal to make the whole world believe as they do?  I love diversity, I love America for being a big old melting pot, but somehow that America is changing.  I don’t want my children to grow up in a world that only sees things in black and white.  I want them to experience all the beautiful colors life has to offer.  I want folks to live life happy, and if people are not hurting, killing, stealing or committing some horrible crime, why can’t they be allowed to live as they see fit?

I hope one day, all of humankind, will embrace the beauty of diversity…

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